What ARE Conservatives Conserving?

I’ll admit right off the bat that use this question as the title of an essay is not original. I suspect it’s been used many times before, but I particularly remember it being used back in Canada in reference to certain policies of conservatives belonging to, well, the Conservative Party. I’ll steal it anyway, ‘cause it just seems so darn appropriate looking forward to a second Bush term. The Republican Party, and the Bush Administration in particular, have a fascinating agenda in store for us over the next four years. So let’s look and see what these folks intend to Save for Posterity:

Yet another go at oil drilling in ANWR. The Administration will generally continue to open up National Forests, Monuments & Parks as well as Wilderness Areas to vastly increased resource exploitation.
… so they aren’t conserving the Environment…

Coal and Oil will continue to be the focus of our National Energy Policy. And of course, proper Forest Management includes widespread application of clear-cut logging and mineral extraction.
… so they aren’t conserving our Natural Resources…

More tax cuts, even in the face of the largest deficits AND debt in US history.
… so they aren’t conserving the National Treasure…

Continued unilateral action in the Iraq war, non-participation in International Agreements, and abandonment of the United Nations.
… so they aren’t conserving our (do we have any left?) International Goodwill…

Continued use of the US Armed Forces to implement Democracy in the Middle East, prosecute the War on Terror, contain the Axis of Evil, and generally participate in expansion of the American Empire and other kindergarten notions of Foreign Policy, all in the face of ongoing civilian “transformation” of Military planning and doctrine.
… so they aren’t conserving our Military Power…

Continuation, and perhaps expansion of the Patriot Act, use of Military Tribunals instead of Legal Due Process, more phonetically-based addition of names to the “Do Not Fly” list, and generally expanding the scope and authority of agencies of the Homeland Security Administration to monitor and prosecute the American Public.
… so they aren’t conserving our Civil Rights…

Gratuitous modification of the Constitution to pander to the Republican base (gay marriage amendment) and for obvious short-term political gain (allowing Arnold to run for President). And presumably expanded use of Gerrymandering following its successful use in Texas to add 3 Senate seats the Republican Majority.
…so they aren’t conserving the Constitution…

But wait! They ARE conserving something:
(1) The Wealth of the Rich,
(2) The Power and Influence of well-connected Defense Companies,
(3) Unrestricted Gun ownership, and
(4) The “Moral Values” of a small, fanatical, but very politically active religious sect.

Well whaddya know... I guess they ARE conservatives after all.